Compartment 11

This shelf has different digital and analog media formats, including CDs, VHS tapes, and floppy discs.

The box of floppy discs seems to be specifically designed to contain floppy discs. The top floppy disc in the box is labeled ‘Personal Files’ – I imagine my grandparents kept information regarding financials, their house, or perhaps other family documents on them. Given that they were both mental health professionals and inclined towards writing, it’s possible these files were even more personal in nature - i.e. journals or personal notes. I would be curious to try to access them and read them. I think there’s a 50/50 chance they might be very interesting, or very boring.

I tried to play the VHS tapes on a CRT television that I took from the house, which was intended to be part of this exhibition. The CRT television ate the VHS tapes and I had to force one of them out, ripping the tape in the process. Two of the VHS tapes are unlabeled, one of them reads ‘Part One Marital Dialogue’ on its label. I would be curious to watch this one – it’s clearly a reference tape for family therapy. I would be so thrilled if either of my grandparents appeared on it.

The CDs on the shelf are also about family therapy and marriage counseling. When I see all of these materials and think about their career focus and the work they did together in family therapy and couples counseling, as pioneers in this field, I think about the health of their marriage, which was stable and seemed happy to me, though I later realized was not without it’s strains and challenges. It was my Henry’s second marriage – I know very little about his first wife. I do know that they married when Judy was around 21 years old and had my father when she was 22. She says she regrets having kids so young, though she doesn’t regret having the kids she has.

Henry and Judy were very different in temperment – my grandfather boistrous, gregarious, but also at times socially insensitive or clumsy or offensive, like many men from that era. He loved the outdoors and arts/culture – he was a mountaineer, skier, avid hiker, rock climber, birder, sailor, cellist, art collector, and more. He was pretty good at some of these things but sometimes bit off more than he could chew. My grandmother was and is erudite, socially sensitive, well read, cultured, politically attuned, and also a lover and collector of art and antiques. However, though I often think of her as being depressed or even agoraphobic, I think the simplest and truest explanation is that, like many other women of her generation (including quite a few of my friends’ grandmothers), she just spent a lot of time in bed after a certain point in her life. I think this had to be hard for my grandfather too and, of course, was and is hard for Judy, though I think going outside is harder. I relate to her desire – I find it very easy to stay in bed all day.

I know they loved each other and loved my dad and his brothers and me and my cousins and our moms so much, and they created beautiful lives and beautiful legacy for this side of my family, and a warm, closeness and so much happiness. Still, like in any family, there were challenges and I’m only aware of some of them, so I find myself speculating about how much I was not aware of and projecting my own secrets onto that mystery. This year, I only had time to get the film projector working and play an old film. Maybe next year, I’ll read the personal files on the floppy discs and maybe I’ll find some answers there.